Friday, June 30, 2006

New Pole Tricks

I start my advanced pole dancing class next Thursday. Last night I had a little taste of things to come, and I got to practice some of the tricks I know with Gabrielle's supervision. I haven't been in pole class for two weeks and it's been a little too hot to play on the pole very much at home. I was a little concerned I'd be a weakling after this little break.

Fat chance! The pilates classes are keeping my core strong. In order to go upside-down, Gabrielle insists that you must be able to do three crunches in a row on the pole (pivoting the body, holding yourself up with your arms but lifting with your core, then pulling the knees up to your head so your tailbone is pointed at the ceiling). Yeah, I can do that. She spotted me the first couple times, then I just went dog wild and kept going upside-down until class was over. Then I went home to do it for my blog photo. It's so fun!

Other tricks from last night included jumping onto the pole and sliding down with the pole between the thighs (chaffes), the monkey (difficult, one-arm spin that tugs on the shoulder), and running to jump on the pole, sliding down and landing in the splits, then hopping back onto your toes). I don't do complete splits, but I can fake it nicely. I got a nasty rug burn on my big toe when I did it at home. Gabrielle said that the advanced tricks don't feel good at all, and I'll have plenty of bruises. I counted eighteen this morning.

Thursday, June 29, 2006

New Headshots!

I got my pictures done by Chris Ann, a friend from Flirty Girls. I needed new headshots to reflect the longer hair, the lack of moles, and the slimmer body. I love my photos by Denice, but I've shot with her the past two times and I wanted to be shot by someone with a different eye this time.

The pictures turned out great. I was pleased. I paid a makeup artist to do the makeup, but I thought she was going to to my hair as well. Eeek! I was wrong. This is completely natural hair, flyaways and all.

This was my first time to shoot digital photos. Denice just uses film. I know that digital video requires more light. I think the same thing is true with the photos. I felt like I was going to go blind at times from the indirect natural light, depending on where Chris Ann was standing with the camera. It was fun, though. The cool thing about digital is that the mistakes can be erased so you don't have a CD full of pictures where you look totally stupid.

I would recommend Chris Ann to others. She's very nice and she enjoys what she does. If you book with her, mention my name so I can get a kickback. :) Just be sure to do your hair or arrange for a hair stylist to meet you there.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006


Cookie Day!

Two days after today left on the diet. I've been gradually reintroducing foods so my body is used to them when the diet is over. Today I got my first cookie in six weeks, and I get a cookie a day for the next two days. Hooray!

I had a peanut butter chip cookie from the coffee shop right next door to my office. It was a little crunchy for my liking, but it was a cookie. I've missed cookies. I'd love to bake some cookies but that's not happening until the weather is cooler.

I got new headshots this morning to reflect the newer, skinnier, mole-less me with longer hippy hair. I pick up the CDs of the images this evening. What was really nice was weighing myself this morning after six weeks of dedication to my diet and weighing 101 pounds. (I know my weight's going to fluxuate a couple of pounds from day to day, but DAMN! This is cool!)

Tuesday, June 27, 2006


Making Change

I went to pilates last night (which was awesome as usual). My teacher said something rather poigniant in regards to our bodies, but it's applicable in all areas of life. She said, "If you don't like something, you have to DO something to change it. If something's not working, change." This is a philosophy that we apply in Scientology counseling (since I'm trained in that), and it's useful in every endeavor. If something's not working, change.

I have great headshots, but they're not getting me the auditions and interviews I need so I'm changing. I wanted a tighter, fitter body so I had to stop eating Doritos and sitting on the couch and start working out and doing the diet. (I ran into two gals over the weekend who wanted to lose weight and change their bodies but they didn't want to change any of their current habits or ideas about dieting. Too bad for them.) I wanted better credit so I had to (finally) do a little budgeting and a little growing up.

These are small changes, I know. But I'm winning with the small changes, and I'm taking on a little more responsibility with each change. If I become a little more responsible each day, then I'll be a lot more responsible by the end of the year. Now that I've got a workout regimen and better eating habits, I think I'll start tackling my housekeeping with a little more responsibility. It's easier to live and work in a clean environment. Today I resolve to vacuum one room in my house every day. In two weeks, it should be another little habit.

Monday, June 26, 2006

Girl Scouts Say: "Always Travel With a Buddy"

I had an audition today for a modeling print job. The audition location changed over the weekend (I got the invitation to audition last Monday). They actually held the auditions at a motel in Santa Monica.

Yep. I said a motel. Motels aren't bad places. I stayed in plenty with Andrew and the two dogs as we moved from St. Louis to L.A. It's just a little creepy to be called to a motel to audition. There's an urban legend I'm sure that's begging to be told about a girl who went to a motel room to audition but instead of an audition she was greeted by a bunch of cannibals who devoured her as she stood there in her strappy sandals screaming. I didn't want to be that urban legend girl.

That's why I took a buddy. Andrew has always been more than willing to accompany me on any auditions that seemed questionable. It's always worked out well (obviously). Nothing bad happened today, but it's nice to take someone along to kick some ass in the event that becomes necessary. (He's actually gotten a couple roles out of tagging along with me, and they liked him better than me when he read with me because the reader wasn't there yet at one audition.)

That's my tip for the day. If you feel like it's questionable then take a buddy. Then you can be an ass-kickin' duo if the need arises.

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Cut!

I went to the callback and rocked in the first part. There were about fifteen girls that were called back today and who knows how many guys. There were six of us remaining, of which I was one. Then a couple girls drifted in late, so I think they were flowed straight into the second reading (which was like a second callback).

I got there a half-hour before the cold reading for my role was going to start so I could read over the sides. When I was done with my reading, the director asked me to hang out in the hall with all of the other girls. When he got through everyone, he came out and announced which guys and gals could go home. I wasn't on the list. I made a second callback! Problem was I had to wait until he got through all the guys who came in before he got to the third round for the girls. It wasn't the worst wait. I had Andrew there. Josh Green (from Torrid Affaire and Director's Cut) showed up while I was waiting, as did Tawny Mertes (from Kappa Lambda Lambda). I got to visit with each of them.

The director called in the reamining eight girls to the theatre about three and a half hours after I first arrived. He had us wait in the house while each girl got up to read with the other female lead. The idea was to make it go faster, not to intimidate people as they waited for their turn. I was second. I did my read, he gave me some direction, I did a little more then my turn was over. As I watched the third girl, I realized my casting is more along the lines of the other role, not the one I was auditioning for. I make a better warped girl next-door than a nice girl next-door. It was no surprise when I got cut. But Tawny got a third callback and Josh was about to do his second callback, so I may have one or two really great reasons to go see the show.

I learned two things from my experience today:

1. They liked me. They liked me enough to call me in out of who knows how many people, and they liked me enough to select me for the top six girls for the role. That's pretty damn good, especially with an open call. I know I wasn't totally right for the role. But they liked me. We may cross paths again, and I may be a better fit for the next project.

2. Make friends with the competition. I think I was up for the same role as Tawny in Kappa Lambda Lambda. We were both cast, but I think they were originally considering me for her role. I saw her at an audition for a music video in January, and she was also called in from her submission for this role. Chances are pretty good that we'll be at the same audition again in the future. She's a sweet girl and I'd love to work with her again. I invited her to Torrid Affaire but she couldn't make it, but she remembered that I invited her. This town is too small to get pissy with the competition. Hell, we have to help each other along if we want to succeed ourselves. And by making friends instead of enemies it makes these long auditions even more bearable.

Open Call

It's been a while since I've been to an open call audition. The last one was at some hotel downtown (filled with Hollywood puke wannabes) and I waited for almost two hours, I was about to leave and they called me upstairs (where I waited for another thirty minutes). It's snotty, but I just don't like open calls.

So how did I wind up at an open call? I submitted my headshot and resume on Now Casting for this play. I knew it was an open call, but I wasn't going to go if I didn't hear from them. They emailed me and invited me to audition. How could I not go?

I was late for belly dancing class, so I headed straight for the audition, thinking it went from 1 PM to 4 PM. Wrong. It started at noon and there were about thirty people waiting in the hall to go in, hand over their headshot, get cut off during their monologue and sent away. I signed in and plopped down in the floor of the hallway. I had Andrew there to entertain me so the wait didn't seem so long. The hall smelled like a locker room. (Okay, part of that was my fault. I grabbed a pair of pants that I got from my sister, didn't wash but instead threw in a box, wore them four times and threw them on a chair assuming they were sort-of clean, and a shirt that was in the box with the stinky pants and was therefore also stinky.)

They called me in, laughed at the part of the monologue they let me perform, had me do it another way, stopped me and asked if I was free today (Sunday). I wiggled my way down the overpacked hall and went home to get ready for a party that evening.

I got the call around 5:15 PM. They liked me. I got a callback for today. This just goes to show that open calls don't all have to be painful.

Tints and Tails

Yesterday I went for a waxing and a lash tint. I'll start off with the tale of the waxing, then tell you about my first lash tint.

I made my first trip for the bikini wax at the spa in March. It was so much easier to have someone else do the waxing, and if any of you are going to get your "special place" waxed to any degree be sure they use hard wax (not that crappy taffy stuff that you can make in your microwave with water, lemon juice and sugar). This was my fourth trip for waxing my own Southland, third time to get the playboy wax (just two steps away from having the Telly Savalis or what my spa calls the Full Monty). At this point, the waxing isn't painful at all. I don't have to cry out in shock or surprise. I prefer the waxing to shaving because of shave bumps. Yuck. I highly recommend that if you start waxing you don't take months off between. It's just easier when you do it on a regular basis. And if you've never waxed before, take it on a gradient. Don't just go straight for the Sinead O'Connor.

Okay, now I'll spin you a yarn about my lash tint. My eyelashes are very blonde. Last time I went in to get my brows done, my gal recommended a lash tint. So after she waxed the Southland, she washed her hands and prepped my eyelids. She told me not to shake or open my eyes because the dye would burn. Then she wiped some glop on my lids (which I later found out was Vaseline to keep the dye from staining my eyelids). With the glop all over my eyelids, she told me to open my eyes. I could see some glop stuck between my top and bottom lashes (which is funny because I had my contacts out and I'm pretty blind without contacts or glasses), and then it fell into my eye. So my eyes were tearing up and the lids were really heavy and she told me just to close my eyes and try to relax and fall asleep. She applied the dye and told me not to shake. Just try to go to sleep. So I was trying to go to sleep when she told me to relax my eyes because I was holding them too tightly closed. I tried relaxing and she started peeling my lids open just a little bit. (Now, I was supposed to keep my eyes closed because the dye would burn and my eyes are still irritated from the glop.) It wasn't bad while I was lying there with the dye newly applied. That's when she started working on my brows. The eyebrow cycle involves waxing below the brow, above the brow, the Bert area, trimming and tweezing. I was fine until we got to the tweezing. There's really no way to completely brace yourself when it comes to tweezing. It's worse (to me) than waxing. I was trying so hard to keep my eyes closed in a relaxed way while she tweezed AND asked me questions about the diet. I can't stay still when I talk in life, so this was a bad idea. After she finished the brows, she cleaned the glop off my lids and I helped her "wash" (with wet cotton cloths) the dye off my lids. She recommended I not do it again because I shook too much. Knowing that we started off with Vaseline, I think I can try it once more.

You can barely see the improvement in the photo, but my lashes are now dark brown. I went to my audition with no mascara, so that was a win.

Saturday, June 24, 2006

Whatever Happened to . . . ?

Oh, you mean that theatre company I auditioned for back in February or March? Um, yeah. About that. I was stuck in a maybe on the whole thing. I mean, I could shell out some cash to be part of a theatre group for a chance to be in a show, or I could keep my money and not be part of that specific group and maybe not be in a show. Hmmm.

So when I'm stuck in a maybe, usually something happens to force me to make a decision. What happened? I had some large bill arrive the day after the meeting so I didn't have the money to spare. I tried backing out gently but that didn't work, so I just stopped communicating. They stopped sending me emails in April or May.

I totally understand what this group is trying to do, and there are lots of other little theatre groups forming all over L.A. There's too much talent and not enough parts, or at least the talents don't feel that they're really being seen enough. They decide to get together with some friends and put up a show but that costs money so they pool their resources to put up a show. Then they want to add some variety to their group (and have a little more cash for their shows) so they bring in new members. It's very admirable, and if you can deal with the freedoms and barriers of that game then go for it.

When I went to that fateful Monday meeting, I figured out that this was not my game. I didn't see myself fitting in with this group. It felt like it would be a sideways step for me instead of a step forward. I already have my own playwright on retainer, so I could get an awesome play script with a role that I want to play. I'd much rather shell out money for a show where I have a good role, and there was no promise of getting a good (or bad) role for my investment. They had all of their shows cast up into July, so I had no possibility of a role until August (which is when we were looking at doing Sonny). And I think I may have had more credits on my resume than the other guys, so I didn't know how much I would learn from these people. (Snobby, right?)

So I made the right choice -- for me. If I'm going to pay to play, I think I'm going to pay for a good role and for Andrew to have his work heard.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

102!

That's right, folks. I'm down to 102 lbs.! As Garrick would say, w00+! (I hope I did that right.) I'm several days into my re-feeding program. Yesterday I had pineapple and blackberries, this morning I had strawberries. Today I get three pieces of bread (significantly better than being able to eat a limited number of crackers for the earlier part of the diet). I'm eating so much food that it's as if I added another complete meal to what I was eating on the diet. I look pretty healthy right now. I get popcorn Sunday night and cookies next week, then it's off the diet!

Obviously I'll have to get new headshots. I did my last two sets of pics with Denice Duff (who is awesome), but I'm going to someone new this time. I want to go to someone who doesn't see me the same way as she may have a couple years ago. This time I'm getting photos done by a fellow Flirty Girl, Chris Ann. With the longer hair and the leaner hips (and the missing moles), I may look completely different from how I've been marketing myself for the past couple years. I'll post my new pics here so you can follow the saga.

In addition, I had to get new clothes. I can still wear the old shirts I had, but the pants require belts pulled really tight just to hold the old pants up. Since my work pants are obscenely loose and the new ones aren't done being altered, I've been wearing jeans to work the past few days. Kae Ellen brought me some of her little pants last fall (since she had a baby and all), so I've been wearing those.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006


The Good Life

This is the day I got Felicity the Gap hoodie for dogs I promised her months ago. Obviously she likes wearing it. Piper's in a neckerchief because Andrew didn't want her to get jealous. She'd rather be nude anyway. And this is Andrew close to his nerdiest. He's got the glasses on but no comic book or puppet in hand.

I love coming home every day to this.

Cobwebs

My friend Jimmy, also known as Andrew's writing partner on Beanman, shot himself in the head back in February. A lot happened that week, so I may not have stopped long enough to really ralize and acknowledge that he was dead. Jimmy and I weren't terribly close at all, but we were friendly and we'd talked a number of times. He was funny and I suspect he was in the same political camp as me. He was well-loved by people, and he had some good acting credits under his belt and an agent to be envied. I was pissed that he shot himself because he had so much going for him. I didn't make it to the memorial. I just kept going with my own life.

I keep running into remnants of Jimmy. I read an email that his mom sent Andrew last week. That was weird. It was hard to think of Jimmy as dead since I hadn't seen him since before Christmas. It was like he was just out of town.

The week before I found an old message book at home with his cell number inside. I guess he called Andrew last year and left a message that I wrote down.

The week before that I sent out emails to invite people to my Flirty Girls graduation. I've invited Jimmy to all of my actor-type events for the past two years. I always added him to the list. It was weird not to invite him because he's abandoned that body.

Two weeks before that I found his scanner in my office. He left it for Andrew to scan Beanman so they could collaborate with Jimmy living in Texas. That was weird.

My relationship with him wasn't close enough for me to have a big cathartic cry. I keep finding these reminders of his death, and I'm reminded that I don't know what I should be experiencing. I guess it's just weird for me.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Flab No More

I've spent the past four months of my life working really hard to build muscle and get rid of flab. This meant shelling out the moolah for the diet, submitting myself and many hours to the infomercial, taking an extra (and extra-awesome) pole dancing class, and doing classes at Soma. I'm no longer embarrassed at the idea of wearing a bathing suit (not that it stopped me from going to the beach anyway; I just went naked).

Last night Andrew went with me to Pilates class. When I described it to him, I said it wasn't that bad and it just stretched things out and you could feel the muscles working during class only and there was no pain after. Well, that was my experience. I guess with all the working out I have the strength and stamina to go through the Pilates motions with relatively little pain. My muscles are already conditioned to working like that. While he survived the class (and seems willing to return), I don't think he was pain-free after.

So that got me thinking that maybe I should keep my body in shape so I never have to go through that initial phase of horrible muscle cramps and wanting to vomit during and after a workout that I've experienced when I started a workout program after getting flabby. I'm sure it's easier for these action film stars to go into their next film if they don't have to go through the first phase of working out each time because they're already in shape.

Sunday, June 18, 2006

What Is Art?

Yesterday I dragged Andrew to the Getty so he could "think about all he's done." (I thought that was kind of funny. He went willingly, and he didn't do anything bad or specific to think about.) Anyway, the Getty is the perfect place for artists of all trades to visit while in L.A. I've raved about the Getty before. It's a great place to disconnect from this crazy city and view fantastic works of art. It really feels like you step into Europe when you get off the tram (and not the smelly parts of Europe).

There's a whole lot to see there, so you've really got to pace yourself so you can appreciate the things you do stop to view. It's about quality rather than quantity. No reason to rush through and not really look at anything, especially when admission is free. Yesterday we checked out illuminated manuscripts featuring saints, martyrs and other holy folks. We also viewed this incredible "motion picture" by a French dude. That, coupled with hot tea and snacks in the open air and a trip to the cactus garden, filled the afternoon.

I always learn something as an artist when I go to the Getty. Yesterday I really looked at everything I viewed (I mean really looked), and I noticed that the artwork wasn't perfect. GASP! I know, I'm probably blaspheming according to someone because these are the works of masters that were recovered and shipped off to display at the Getty. How dare I! But I dare. Sometimes there were no fingers on the hands. Things were out of proportion. Some of the illuminated manuscripts were a bit Cubist-looking. Some of the faces were awkward. But with all of these flaws, the artwork still communicated what was intended. The imperfections didn't inhibit the communication.

I don't have to obsess with perfection in my work. I just have to make sure that my intention is communicated and not blocked by any flaws. (And you thought I was just going to rag on the masters.)

Saturday, June 17, 2006

Re-Feed Me, Seymour!

I finally got my Re-feeding program yesterday and started it immediately. I get to have bread again (hooray) instead of crackers, and it can't be any of that crappy health nut bread that I've been told to eat before. Yay! I have a loaf of organic whole wheat in my freezer just waiting for me to toast a slice.

The diet is totally personalized based on your blood tests and metabolic levels so they tell you what amounts of what food you can eat during the major weight-loss portion. On the Re-feeding, they have a 30-day eating schedule but they tell you which numbered days you should eat. You don't have to eat all thirty days unless they tell you that you do. I started out on day four. I got to add more protein and vegetables yesterday, and I get to add more today. I also got to have pineapple for the first time in over a month, which was fantastic. I get to add more meat and veggies for a few days (and more "forbidden" fruit like mulberries), then I get to add "bad" fruits (like bananas and strawberries) and some pasta or popcorn, followed by butter on my toast and cookies at the end. At some point I won't have to wait the five hours between meals any more. I should be done with Re-feeding in two weeks unless I gain weight during the process, which would make it take longer. I also have the opportunity to lose more weight as I re-educate my body to accept other foods.

I know I keep pimping this program, but it's really been the best diet I've ever experienced. (That, and a lot of actors' casting demands that they're slim and fit so they don't look heavy on-camera.) The food is good, I've lost fat and not muscle, and I get to ease my body back into having pasta and cheesecake. I have made some positive changes in my eating habits, and I'll have to continue those changes to keep the weight off. (So I don't need to eat half a pizza just because Andrew does.) If you haven't gone to check out this diet, you should.

Friday, June 16, 2006

The Great Pants Pull of 2006 - Part Two

When we last left off, dear reader, I was going on about how women's clothing sizes have been horribly affected by vanity sizing. This makes size 12 the new 2 and pants for anorexic chicks unavailable off the catwalk.

This is a photo of me in the wedding photo pants. I can fit my hand crosswise into the front and still have a little wiggle room. This is the old "pants pull" that they use in infomercials showing weight loss. Yes, I know I'm wearing a different shirt, but this is The Doodlebug Jr. Ringer and I have to advertise my product.

So back to pants shopping. Dudes have it easy. They go by the waist and inseam measurements in inches. Easy enough to figure out. Just measure each and go to the store. There's no surprise when they go to buy pants. Sure, some pants are more flattering for some body types than others, but the pants usually fit the same at the waist and inseam. Why not have the same system for chicks? If you want low-rise pants, measure the low ab and inseam. Take those numbers into the mall and hunt for the pants of your dreams. Do the same thing if you want old-rise pants. Guys don't know what the numbers mean anyway. (Really, you don't.) So what if you have to go buy a pair of 31x28 low-rise pants. At least you know which racks to hit for your clothes so you don't have to drag pants of the same style but three different sizes into the dressing room in hopes that one fits right. If we're all completely honest about it, it doesn't matter anyway. This vanity sizing is grade-A bullcrap (and truthfully, it's fooling women into believing that the crap they're eating isn't causing any change in their bodies).

I'll go first. Low-rise 29x28. Next?

Thursday, June 15, 2006

The Great Pants Pull of 2006 - Part One

This is a picture from my mom's wedding. Mousketeer role call left to right: my older sister Charlotte, me, Mom, my small sister Kae Ellen and her little muffin Ashton. You can see that the top I'm wearing is a little tight around my ribs. You can't really see the pants, but they were flatteringly snug. (This means that they hugged everything but the waistband didn't cut into anything and cause me pain.) This was April of this year.

When I did my measurements right after I finished the infomercial classes, I had lost about 12" all over my body. An inch or two of that in my waist (which is right below the rib cage per their system) was actually from the workout. The rest of it came from the diet. I think I've lost more inches since. Yesterday I wore a pair of Old Navy size 2 dress pants to work that I could easily pull off without unfastening them. I had to wear a belt to hold them up, and these pants weren't really designed for a belt.

It's starting to get obscene with how far my regular pants droop. The legs seem a lot longer because I don't have much to hold the top of the pants up. This prompted me to go out Wednesday afternoon in search of new pants.

There's a problem with modern pants for ladies. The sizes are inconsistent. I have a pair of size 4 khakis from Target that I can still get away with wearing, but both pair of my Old Navy 2s were falling off. I went to New York & Company for some work pants, thinking that last time I lost weight I was able to find some 2s or 4s there that fit nicely until I started gaining weight. I tried on a pair of 2s (the smallest size I could find there) and I could fit Doodlebug's 18 lb. body in the front of the pants and still be comfortable. They were way too big. I had to dig through the clothing racks of Forever 21 for a pair of small work pants. I found something that didn't look like it would fall apart during the pants debut (unlike most of their clothing) and snatched it up.

Here's what I don't get about women's clothing -- why did they have to start that crappy vanity sizing? I remember when I was a size 3 in high school. How is it that I could be 30 lbs. heavier and only move up to a size 4? And how is it that I could be a size 4 and weigh 118 lbs. but other people would also be a 4 and weigh in at 150? They added size 0 when I was a teenager. Are they going to have negative pants sizes available soon when they change the waist measurement-pants size scale again? And the sizes are inconsistent from store to store, and sometimes within the same store. I may find a size 2 jean that fits at Old Navy but the size 2 work pants are like a parachute. What's the deal?

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

one of us one of us one of us

After years of ridges and refusals, I've finally signed up for a myspace account. I know. Seth Godin says its a place for flirting and I've got a man so I didn't think it was a place for me. In February of this year, we played songs by three bands who have myspace accounts. Bands, not flirts. I found out a few weeks ago the husband of my headshot photographer has a music page where I heard one of his songs, and he's really quite good. My three single siblings are on myspace though, so I didn't think I belonged.

That is, until yesterday. My regular acting partner in school, Andy Rhodes, found Andrew on myspace. (Yeah, my HUSBAND had a myspace account and I was worried about joining the 'flirt' network.) I have such affinity for Andy because we went through thick and thin together, delivering jaw-dropping performances and getting chastised by our director at unpredictable times. I hoped he was fine, but I didn't know where to find him. Now I do.

I figured I could find some old pals and hook up (friend-wise) with new friends I meet in this crazy business via myspace. I've been asked so many times on set if I have myspace. I'm still blogging here because this is my blog home.

So I spent Tuesday night filling in my profile and trolling for "friends" to add to my account. I guess the idea is that you can have more rapid communication with "friends." Who knows. I'm still a novice with this thing.

Monday, June 12, 2006

Pilates - Hot Damn!

It seems like all I'm writing about is workout classes, I know. But I'm down to 104 lbs. today and I gained four pounds of muscle while working on Flirty Girls and passing the beginner and intermediate levels of Aphrodite Strip-N-Pole. I don't want to lose that muscle, and I want to keep this body so I can keep booking those high school senior roles. (By the way, I was selected to be a high school party attendee for pay last Friday. I couldn't keep the gig because I got notice to late in the day to be well rested.)

Tonight I went to pilates class at Soma. I love Soma. The Monday-Wednesday night classes are taught by Thalia, the cute little Aussie powerhouse who owns the studio. She's awesome. It was a solid hour (and ten minutes) workout. We moved pretty rapidly from one exercise to the next. I got a way better workout than I did a year ago when I was doing Winsor Pilates DVDs in an unsuccessful attempt to lose weight. When we were doing each exercise, I felt the muscles really working (which was a little tiring) but I'm not sore now. Pilates is perfect for dancers, and it's even better for people who want to work out but don't want to pant themselves into exhaustion (Andrew).

So if you feel you've got a lazy ass, get yourself to a pilates class! The teacher corrected some things I'd been doing wrong from the books and videos for a couple years, and it's really nice to be surrounded by people working toward the same goal. Hell, there was even a dude in the class! My goal is to maintain my muscle and turn my one pack into a two pack.

Sunday, June 11, 2006

Skinny Blues

I've been on the diet for just over three weeks. Or has it been a month? Anyway, I emailed them a week ago on Wednesday for my Re-feeding Program. I was down to 107 lbs. that day (on the home scale), target weight for my body is 100-106 lbs. I guess I got confused with the two different email addresses referenced in the hatting material for the diet and sent my email to the wrong address. I talked to my friend Marina who did the diet and she told me this Wednesday (one week after my first email) to send an email to consultants@1stpersonaldiet.com for my Re-feeding Program. So I did and I heard back almost immediately. I had to do another blood test. I did the blood test Thursday morning, so now I go back to waiting.

I'm down to 105. The infomercial scale said I was 110.8 last Monday, but I'm sticking with the home scale. The home scale matches the scale at Soma, so I'm not too worried about it. I went out and bought some XS tops from the Gap last week for the infomercial, and they fit nicely. The pants I bought for the wedding are too big and now require a belt, and I can fit the skinny jeans Kae gave to me last fall. My workout pants are a little loose in the trunk and they're smalls. I'm leaner which is very cool.

The only problem is that I've been very hungry for the past week. I'm sure part of that has to do with the fact that I should actually be close to one week into my Re-feeding. The food quantities change during Re-feeding. I'm not working out more. The hatting warned that if you work out and you start getting hungry then you're working out too much. I only had one pole class (the one I pay for) Thursday night (which is pretty low impact) and belly dancing yesterday. Why the hell am I so hungry? I've been eating shrimp for breakfast and lunch for the past few days and I'm still hungry. I wish I was allowed five more crackers or two more pieces of fruit each day just to keep pace with the hunger. I've been filling myself up with hot and iced black tea and Hansen's diet grapefruit soda. It's not working as well as I hoped, but it suffices as a temporary fix.

I have a freezer with five different types of cookies and a refrigerator with four mini Twix bars waiting for me to finish this program. I've gone to the movies TWICE and avoided getting popcorn (very hard to do). Marina said she never got this hungry. Maybe I'm just a freak. At least I'm a 105 lb. freak.

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Belly Dancing!

I took my first belly dancing class today. I didn't want to lose the muscle I gained doing Flirty Girls and Aphrodite, so I'm taking belly dancing and pilates at Soma.

I was surprised that there were so few people there. We spent a lot of time warming up and stretching, but it's necessary when you're working parts of the body you don't usually work. We did rib, hip and shoulder isolations. We also shimmied and kicked, and we worked with veils (a great workout for the arms). I had a lot of fun and I'll be returning next week.

One of the most memorable things about this experience was something the teacher, Jamilla, said. She said it's going to feel awkward (and it did most of the time) and we're going to feel like we don't look good in the beginning (true), but it takes training in technique to really learn a fine art so you can put it all together and improvise. It takes time to look good and natural when you're learning a new skill. SO TRUE! I feel that in some of the other classes I've taken (dance, fitness, martial arts, etc.) I was expected to be perfect and know exactly how my body was supposed to move in the first class. This was different. She also said that everyone's body is different and moves differently so don't desire looking like someone else while dancing. We each have our own assets that others may not have, and we have to learn to accentuate those assets and draw attention to those. That's a good metaphor for the industry.

Friday, June 09, 2006

Designer Dog

I saw a special on designer dogs on "CBS Sunday Morning" a couple weeks ago. They talked about the Golden Doodle, the Spidoodle, the Shitzpoodle, the Crap Noodle, and the Oodle Doodle Boodle. I guess the new thing is to breed a dog with a poodle, print up some fancy papers with a laser printer, slap a big pricetag and a cutesy name on the offspring and refer to yourself as a breeder of designer dogs.

My Doodlebug (Felicity) is not part poodle. She's supposed to be all dalmatian. Mom had black spots, Dad (who we never saw because he belonged to some random neighbor) had brown spots. Technically speaking, Felicity is a bastard who was totally abandoned by her birth father after he got his jollies. She has no papers since she was born "out of wedlock," so I figure I'll make my own papers for my personal designer dog.

She's the oddest dalmatian I've ever seen. We found out that she's what's called a lemon dalmatian. I'd call her a designer dog simply because her spots match my hair, so she was obviously specially designed for me. I don't get the ear thing. Who knows why the ears stand up. My guess is that she didn't like the ear infections from the regular dal ears last lifetime.

I'd say The Doodlebug is a far superior designer dog than these Joodles, Koodles, Foodles and Scrapsfloodles. How many of these designer dogs are as personalized a match for the owners? I think it takes a lot more than having a random dog hump a poodle to make a true designer dog.

Thursday, June 08, 2006



End of the Infomercial - Part Two

I did my weigh and measure Monday along with my "after" photo shoot. Tuesday I did the testimonial.

I had a great hair and makeup artist who made me look incredible. They put me in a pretty blue top that made my eyes pop. (I found out later that they were making sure there was no cleavage in the testimonials. I guess that would be too sexy for marketing a POLE DANCING workout.) I tried to buy the top since the price tag said it was only $15 (on the advice of commercial guru Jim Meskimen), but they wouldn't sell it to me since they "needed" things. Whatever. I guess I can go to Nordstrom Rack and see if they have it there.

I told the truth in my testimonial and I was very chipper. I hope it doesn't come across as fake. The biggest thing I got out of the program (other than the ability to pole dance and justify it as exercise) was friendship with all these neat gals. We didn't really get to know each other until near the end of the program, but I made some good friends. I'll really miss the other gals. We're already planning outings together so we can stay in touch.

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

End of the Infomercial - Part One

Sunday we "graduated" from the Flirty Girls program. We had a little recital at Soma so we could show off our skills to our friends and family (and so they could shoot B-roll footage for the infomercial). This is a shot Andrew got with my camera phone of me doing the Tinkerbell.

The production company totally transformed the dance studio into Flirty Girls Central with their symbols and dark red curtains. We all wore pink shirts and black bottoms. I decided to wear black hot pants for two reasons: 1) I could; and 2) I couldn't insist my gal pals wear shorts if I wasn't doing it myself.

Since there were so many of us and we only learned one chair routine and one pole routine, each song (and routine) was done four times so everyone got their chance. I was up first with some hot chicks from the night class doing the chair routine to "Whoa" by Mya. I decided to really ham it up because when I ham it up it seems that the other gals loosen up. I took it over the top. When we were supposed to smack our butts, I smacked the skin right below my shorts. I don't think I got too wild, but I may have been the most untamed one there. As you can see in this shot, my rump got some camera time. It was play time for me. I had a lot of fun doing this dance even though I would never buy the single for this song.

Later in the program, we had a former disco diva sing along with the CD of her new single "Celebrate." My gal pal from Flirty Girls and Aphrodite and I shook our tailfeathers together. She and I have had some wild times over the course of this program.

We later did our pole routine to "Dontcha" by the Pussycat Dolls? I'm sick to death of this song because we've been doing this routine since February. Ugh. But it was playtime again so I smacked my butt and swung around the pole. I think they got more booty footage of me. If you see the infomercial in a few months and it's mostly cheek, that's me.

We wrapped it up with more B-roll but we did the chair dance without any music since the songs are copywritten and I don't think they have permission to use the songs for the program. I was one of the lucky three to dance with Gabrielle and smack it all over again.

All in all, graduation was fun. It would've been nice to get gifts since I did graduate, and pole dancing class is kind of like a trade school. Oh well. I had lots of fun with my sisters in crime, and I met a lot of cool people doing this infomercial.

Monday, June 05, 2006


Puppy Publishing

Okay, I did all the artwork for The Doodlebug Datebook (now available for purchase), but Felicity did all the publishing. I just couldn't wrap my mind around all the cutting and pasting and printing to PDF so I just let her do it. It looks like it turned out okay.

I can't wait to get my hands on a copy of The Doodlebug Datebook. I think I'll accessorize with The Doodlebug Jr. Ringer T-Shirt and The Doodlebug Dog Shirt. Why not?

If you really care about me, you'll support my newfound talent financially. If you don't my dreams may be completely shattered and I'll wind up living on the street in a cardboard box with a pickle jar for a toilet. ;)

Sunday, June 04, 2006



The Haircut

There's a short film by Tamar Simon Hoffs called The Haircut. You can find it on The Allnighter DVD. It's incredible. In the twenty or thirty minutes it takes for the guy to get a haircut he winds up with bottles of wine, a straight razor shave, a foot massage & manicure, and entertainment by Susanna Hoffs and friends.

Saturday I went to a new place for a haircut. In Andrew's goodie bag from the Body Shake at Soma a couple weeks ago, he had an invitation for a free cut and color at Beyond the Fringe in West Hollywood. His hair is so short that the cut wouldn't be much of anything, and his hair isn't gray enough to justify a color. I took the invitation and booked just a cut for myself.

I showed up sweaty and wearing workout clothes because I was rehearsing the dances for our "recital" right before the appointment. I bet I smelled GOOD. Parking was a bitch and there are some strange road blocks in West Hollywood, but I found it and walked in two minutes late. This nice guy held the door for me and signed me in. A lot of times when I go to a place like this (on the edge of Beverly Hills), I feel like I'm surrounded by snooty people who look down on me. (I mean, c'mon, I'm an actor who works an office job to pay my bills, I drive a Mitsubishi instead of a Mercedes, and I do scrape the couch cushions for gas money at least once a month.) Didn't happen here. That was a mark in their favor. (When I'm treated well, I tip well. That comes from living off tips in food service.) They had coffee and cookies in the front, but I'm still on my diet so I didn't partake.

When Robert, my stylist, was ready for me, he sent me into a room to "change" into a robe. I guess this was so I didn't get hair all over my clothes. I peeled off my "decency pants" that I wore over my shorts and threw on the "robe," which was like one of those haircut capes with armholes and pockets. I sat down and talked with Robert about how I wanted to keep the length but add some style. I let him figure out the rest. (I usually don't trust hairdressers to do what I want since I've been disappointed so many times. For some reason, I totally trusted him with my hair.) He passed me off to the younger guy who held the door for me to get my hair washed.

The recliner I was in for the shampoo was SOOOOO comfortable. He offered me a cushion for my head but I didn't need it. We had pleasant small talk as he massaged my scalp with a groovy mixture of shampoos and conditioners. It was fantastic. There's nothing quite like having another person wash your hair, especially when they're as expert as he was. When he was done he offered me a drink -- bottled water, juice, wine(!). I accepted a little bottle of cold water (still on the diet). Wow. What service!

Then he and Robert combed the tangles out of my hair. Robert explained what he was going to do and told me not to be alarmed by the gobs of hair I'd see falling on the floor because we were keeping the length. I still trusted him completely. We talked about my pole class, the weather, my origins, the diet. When he was done cutting, he and the shampooer (valet?) set about drying my massive mane. Then he flat-ironed parts of it so it would lay flat. When I looked in the mirror, I was SOOOOO impressed. He did a fantastic job, made me feel completely comfortable being there, and he did it for free. DAMN!

The regular price is $65 for what I got done. I want to go back there because my hair looks SOOOOO good. I couldn't remember the rules for tipping your hairdresser and shampooer, so I left a $10 for Robert and a $5 for the shampooer whose name starts with a G but I can't remember the whole name.

What an AMAZING place! I'd recommend them as much as I recommend Spoiled A Day Spa for waxing. Wowie!

Saturday, June 03, 2006


My Secret Life - Venturing Into a New Special Skill

This is a bit of a story, so fluff up that pillow under your ass and prepare to read.

I used to doodle as a child. My mother sent me some of my doodlings that I still have packed away in a box. I was discouraged from drawing when I was in third grade (a year younger than the rest of the kids in my class) and the other kids commented on how my drawings were "too realistic." I guess since I was drawing people and they were still working their way through the bunny doodling I wrapped up by age five they got that idea. So I packed up my pencils and crayons until two summers ago. Sure, I did watercolor in the between-time, but not a lot of drawing. I pulled out the pencils and got a sketch pad a couple summers ago after I looked at what made me stop drawing. I decided "To hell with anyone who talks smack about my drawings" and began to doodle again.

I wasn't a frequent doodler. It's still a little intimidating living with Andrew Moore, amazing comic doodler. I just doodled from time to time.

Around March I doodled out an idea for a children's book. I'd write it, Andrew would illustrate. It involved the two dogs. I have these crazy 2-D sketches of Felicity and Piper getting into trouble, just enough to give him an idea of what I want to communicate. Again, just doodles.

In early May he announced he was going to make my character in Sonny a comic book artist. (I think now she's evolved into a cartoonist, but it's the same vein.) I had the brilliant idea to make the program look like a comic book so I doodled it out. It was just supposed to give him or another graphic artist an idea so they could make a good one. Just a doodle.

Every year for about six years we've custom-made my datebook. The cover was photographs, watercolor paintings or full-color graphics by Andrew. He'd make the insides to my specifications, then we'd copy and bind one for me and one for him (if he wanted one). Last year we made the Kung Fu Dog datebook available for purchase in the event someone else wanted a bitchin' datebook. My idea for this year's datebook was to have him do a sketch of The Doodlebug for the cover and update the guts to go with the theme. He's been really busy writing a play, going to school, working on The Felties, bailing hay in the yard. So I thought I might doodle out a cover and doodle out the guts so he could do them "for real" when he was available. (Why the rush? My datebook runs out of pages this Saturday, and next week I have some changes in my routine to keep up with.)

Sunday night we went to John Kricfalusi's cartoon screening in Santa Monica. We've seen him in person before, gotten an autograph. He's a bit of a celebrity to us since we threw a Yak Shaving Party when we were kids. Dude's got mad skills. Dude also referenced a book called Cartoon Animation by Preston Blair on his blog. That's his solution to young cartoonists learning how to do it right. He's even giving free lessons based on the book on his blog.

'Wow," thinks me. 'I could learn how to draw better and it could help me with this character. Andrew will be so surprised and pleased that I was so dedicated. It'll also make any "doodling" I may do over the course of the play look like I could believably make money at it.' So I get the book on Memorial Day and begin to doodle.

So what do I want to doodle? I guess I can work on The Doodlebug. At the very least I can learn to communicate what I want Andrew to do a little bit better.

But the doodling turned into several versions of The Doodlebug. I followed each lesson and made notes of what I liked and didn't like about each drawing. I improved significantly with each lesson. In the end, I wound up with a cover for the new datebook. I even used colored pencils -- Andrew Moore's medium.

I'm not even done with the book yet. I've only spent about three or four hours this week on the whole cycle. OMG!

Tune in next time to see the final product (which will be available for purchase).

Friday, June 02, 2006

Negligent Nellie

Yep, that's me. I've been so self-involved that I haven't posted anything about myself on my blog for people to read about me since Tuesday!

I had my audition for that industrial yesterday. Good times. I had to look like a young mom, and since I lost eleven pounds I don't have all the padding a young mom might. Solution: I wore a jacket and loose pants so I looked like I had a little more weight on me. I think I did fine with the first part of the audition, but I don't know that I gave them what they wanted on the second part. Who ever knows. At least I have something for my audition statistic.

I "graduate" from the Flirty Girls infomercial program on Sunday. If you're local, you can come see 28 girls do chair and pole dances between 2PM and 4 PM. That will be fun, except I have to wear pink and I don't look good in pink.

I've been working on a new skill but it's been far too involved for me to post in this post. Don't worry - you'll see more about my secret other life (and have a chance to support it) soon.